


Take These Broken Wings (And Learn to Fly)

by stripedtightsandsmudgedeyes



Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Angst, Aziraphale Loves Crowley (Good Omens), Crowley Loves Aziraphale (Good Omens), Gabriel isn’t too bad in this one, Happy Ending, Heaven (Good Omens), M/M, Sad Aziraphale, Sad Crowley (Good Omens), WARNING: mentions of suicide
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-29
Updated: 2020-09-30
Packaged: 2021-03-07 17:08:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,405
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26721169
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stripedtightsandsmudgedeyes/pseuds/stripedtightsandsmudgedeyes
Summary: Aziraphale isn’t feeling too good on earth, so he decides to go back to heaven and ask to be done in his work. Crowley isn’t having it and vows to save him. Post Canon.Seriously, read tags because the first chapter (and I’m not sure yet how bad the rest will be) WILL get heavy. Stay safe.-ALSO y’all I forgot to say the title is from Blackbird - The Beatles (that song slaps you should listen to it)
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley
Comments: 2
Kudos: 9





	1. chapter one

**Author's Note:**

> uhh first ao3 post but not first fanfic... yikes. once again there are mentions of some not nice stuff so be careful.

Crowley bounded up the stairs in a blind panic, his chest tight, his eyes starting to tear up with frustration and his fists clenching as they swung at his sides. If he wasn’t in the book shop, where could he possibly be?  
Crowley had never seen the upstairs of aziraphales bookshop. He’d had evening drinks in the comfort of his back room, he’d hidden amongst the shelves to jump out and scare the angel while he worked, and he’d lingered at the entrance doors as he waited for aziraphale to “just hurry up and finish dressing, we’ve got a table booked for six and it’s pushing on 10 passst!”  
Crowley remembered the way he lit up and giggled uncontrollably at his hiss-like emphasis on his words when he was stressed. It always calmed him down.  
But now he was inconsolable. He ran top speed up the stairs which, considering there weren’t that many, seemed to be never ending. Finally, finally, finally! To his relief, he saw the upstairs hallway. Bathroom- not in there. Boiler cupboard- now why would he be in there? And more importantly, why did Crowley look?  
Ah, the door to his bedroom! Maybe he was having some alone time and wanted to sleep.  
The demon cracked the door open slowly and carefully, although a small creak did come from it. It wasn’t a scary sound, though, it was like a warm house that you’d lived in for so many years that you’ve worn to fit your perfect shape.  
“Angel!” Crowley shouted.  
He didn’t get an answer.  
“Aziraphale, I’m here!” He called again.  
The room stayed quiet still.  
Crowley walked around to investigate. The room was cozy, but not small. No, there was plenty of room here, but you could barely tell because of all the stacks of random unorganized books and papers scattered across the floor. For someone who loved to look presentable and came across as a neat man, his living area was a tip.  
Although at the end of the day, Crowley thought, the angel has no need to sleep, so maybe he doesn’t use this room as often as you’d think.  
Right when he was going to give up and go to search somewhere else, Crowley saw a folded piece of parchment on the bed.  
The demon, although he was one, wouldn’t dream of ever touching aziraphale’s personal property without consent. The paper said his name, though. So he picked it up. He unfolded it. His heart was in his throat- what could he have left for him? Good news? Updates on where he could be?  
“If you are reading this, I’m deeply and terribly sorry.” It read. Crowley exhaled sharply and continued.  
“I am offering you my deepest apologies, my dear boy, because I am no longer here. I am no longer on earth, and I am no longer able to contact you.”  
Crowley’s mouth started to go dry. He had to be dreaming.  
Still, the letter continued.  
“I have noticed we’ve grown slightly distant in the recent months. After being stationed as my adversary for rather one too many centuries, I can see why your patience may be wearing thin with me.  
I’ve always been too much of an over thinker. I am quite susceptible to dithering, to being pushed over, to becoming closed off. I know longer feel like there is a place for me anywhere.”  
His eyes began to water as it sank in.  
“I decided to destroy my body. I have gone somewhere remote, though, as to not trouble you with finding it. It was quick. It was easy. I’m going to ask the archangels to devour me in hellfire soon enough, so not only can my work be done on earth, but also up in heaven.”  
Crowley clutched the letter in his hands. Tighter, tighter, like if he let go for a second he would die.  
“I’m so sorry, Crowley. Please know that the last 6000 years have been heaven on earth, and it’s been an honor to call you my friend. I couldn’t have asked for a better person to be stationed with. I love you.”  
Suddenly, the writing became unreadable and began to run as teardrops fell onto the paper and smudged the ink. Crowley had been choking back sobs for a few minutes, but now they started to flow freely. He dropped to the ground, assumed fetal position, and held the letter close to his chest as his whole body shook with each sound of despair he let out.  
“Oh, my angel. I should’ve known you felt like this sooner. Why?” He cried out. “Please, oh please!”  
He clasped his hands together and began to yell; “I’m praying! If you can hear me, help me! Oh god, why him? He was the most perfect angel in heaven! He followed your every order and he loved with his whole heart, and nobody even gave him a passing glance!” Crowley stood up. He ran out of the door and down the stairs, still holding the letter. He bolted out of the front doors, slid into his car almost snake-like, crammed the letter into the glove compartment and slammed his foot on the pedal. He had to go home.  
Well, he couldn’t go home. There was his house, and then there was his home. His home was in aziraphale’s bookshop, sat on aziraphale’s comfy sofa, sipping from aziraphale’s old fashioned wine glasses as he watched aziraphale light up with joy and throw his head back with laughter. He wanted to go home. He sped off down the streets of London, wracking his brain for just one thought of how to get his only friend back.


	2. Chapter two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> yay you get to see heaven in this chapter and you get to see our man shaped being, aziraphale!!

Aziraphale stood awkwardly in front of Gabriel. He figured he’d be used to it by now, as anyone would be expected to. The angel still felt dread bubbling in his chest when he had to make these visits, but this one was his final time. This one didn’t matter. He wasn’t standing awkwardly in a sense of fear, or not knowing what to say. He stood awkwardly but with purpose.   
Gabriel cleated his throat and let out a nervous laugh.  
“You want to... what?”   
“You heard me correctly. I feel like maybe up here and,” Aziraphale pointed downwards, “down there, I’m not as useful as I used to be. I mean, Armageddon is practically water under the bridge-“  
“Armageddon was a mistake that can be rectified. We’re working on it.” The archangel quipped.   
“-yes, well, I do hope that works out for you. We’re digressing, though.”  
Gabriel stood still. He looked at Aziraphale, and he looked VERY hard. There was no trace of a joke on the other’s face.   
“You can’t possibly expect us to allow you to go through with this?” He almost spat out. “You’re one of our best weapons!”  
“That’s all I am to you then, I suppose?”  
“Of course not, Aziraphale! Can’t you see that obviously the almighty values your presence, you haven’t fallen yet!”  
“yet.” Aziraphale repeated. “Yet means it will happen. I won’t be able to handle it. Cro... others will be disappointed in me. I have to stop before it gets to that.”   
“The answer is no, aziraphale. We will not let you destroy yourself.”   
Suddenly, it all got too much. Aziraphale wiped around his eyes, pinched the top of his nose, then covered his face entirely. His shoulders began to shake as he cried.   
“Gabriel, you don’t understand. I cant go on. Earth hates me, heaven thinks I was a mistake-“  
“Woah, woah. Nobody ever said that. Heaven makes no mistakes. If you’re still an angel, it’s for a reason.” Gabriel reasoned (or tried to, anyways.)   
Aziraphale looked at him.   
“You don’t mean that.”  
“I do! What could possibly have made you think we don’t value you?”  
The angel drew a breath, and exhaled slowly.  
“You’re always cruel to me. I don’t think I’ve ever heard a genuinely nice thing from you. I hate visiting you, I hate visiting the others, and I know I shouldn’t use the word so much, but I hate being reminded that you are in charge of me. I don’t care if this makes me fall. This isn’t how heaven is supposed to be.”   
Aziraphale lowered his head and looked at his feet. The other just stared. After what felt like hours, Gabriel opened his mouth.  
“I think we need to have a serious chat.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hola so this is a shorter chapter because I didn’t really know how to flesh it out too much without getting carried away if that makes sense. Anywho, thanks for reading the first chapter. I only noticed a mistake in one of the spellings earlier. Apologies


End file.
